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‘What we were waiting for’: Couple shares journey from infertility to joy

Erin Barreto, a pharmacist, reflects on years of infertility, resilience, healing and the joy of welcoming two children through IVF.
"It was a long, uncertain road filled with setbacks around every corner. When you had those moments of hope, you had to hang on to them."
Erin Barreto, Pharm.D., Ph.D., a Mayo Clinic pharmacist and now mom of two, spent nearly seven years navigating the complex path of infertility with the Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility team at Mayo Clinic in Rochester. The team, comprised of approximately 80 staff members, was recently ranked in the top 10 in Newsweek's "America's Best Fertility Clinics" for the third year in a row. In the last five years, the division has helped welcome more than 1,000 babies into the world.
Erin chose Mayo Clinic because she trusted the data, believed in the success rates and knew that having access to top professionals delivering state-of-the-art care with compassion and empathy could offer hope when it was in short supply.
Though the journey included moments of loss, waiting and resilience, she and her husband, Jason (Jay) Barreto, Pharm.D., held onto the possibility of growing their family.
Along the way, they had a chance to connect with Ali Ainsworth, M.D., the clinical director of in vitro fertilization in Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility.
"Dr. A saw us through it all — miracles and miscarriages," Erin said. "She knew how to advise us because she took the time to get to know us."
"I’m humbled to hear that," says Dr. Ainsworth. "Being part of Erin and Jay's story is a privilege I don't take lightly. Our work is so meaningful — hard and heartbreaking and meaningful."
A journey marked by care and connections
Erin's journey through infertility opened her eyes not only to the medical demands of in vitro fertilization (IVF) but also to the emotional toll it takes. She found grounding in small rituals like wearing a special pair of wool socks to every egg retrieval, a procedure in the IVF process where mature eggs are collected from the ovaries using a thin needle guided by ultrasound.
Funded by a past Joy Project, the socks carried hopeful messages: IVF got hope. Lucky transfer socks.

Erin remembers putting the socks on before each egg retrieval, channeling all the good energy she could muster.
Support came from people, too — Mayo staff who cared for her not just as a patient, but as a person.
Maria Lujero, a nurse in Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility, held Erin's hand during her very first retrieval when she was scared and overwhelmed.
"She was a relieving force. I will never forget it," Erin says.
Chelsea Marquardt was a new nurse when Erin started her journey and helped her with medication counseling. This is an important part of the IVF process because the treatment involves complex, time-sensitive medications that patients often administer themselves.
"Chelsea has been a constant support the whole time. While I am a pharmacist, I wanted in that moment to be a patient, to trust that someone would help walk me through things." says Erin.
Their connection, rooted in that early guidance and nurtured over time, reflects the kind of enduring support that shaped Erin's experience.
Mayo's shift toward a more holistic approach to care also made a difference for Erin, reinforcing her confidence in Mayo Clinic and her care team.
Erin joined the Mind Body Fertility program led by Nicole Callahan, a nurse practitioner, where participants gathered to talk about the emotional side of fertility treatment.
"I was further along in my journey when I joined the program, so it felt healing to give back and support others who were just beginning theirs," Erin says." It was rewarding to be a source of hope."
"We know that fertility treatment is more than just a medical process — it touches every part of a person's life," says Dr. Ainsworth. "Programs like Mind Body Fertility reflect our commitment to whole-person care. It's validating to know that patients like Erin have found benefit and support."
Lessons in resilience
There were hard lessons, too. Learning how to self-advocate came later to Erin than she wished. One especially painful experience involved hearing sensitive news in a clinical way, before she was ready and before Jay could be with her.
In many care settings, results are often shared routinely — sometimes through the patient portal or in straightforward conversations. But over time, Erin realized she needed something more personal.
"Seeing the Mayo number on my phone on days we were expecting test results was especially triggering. I would think to myself, 'They only call when it's something bad that they don't want to send through the portal.'"
"We talked to the care team and made a new plan. Jay would receive the call and gently share whatever news with me at a time that was right. That way, it wasn't one more thing for me to carry. I wasn't forever having to receive and transmit the news that was so often disappointing. I wish I had realized I needed that sooner."
This small change made a meaningful difference for both Erin and Jay. "Being met with compassion in those vulnerable moments changed how we carried the experience," she said.
Her advice to others considering IVF is heartfelt.
"Be hopeful," she says. "Be excited. Find people who understand what you're going through. Build a support system, even if it's small."
The joy that waited
After three transfers — the final step in the IVF process, where one or more fertilized embryos are carefully placed into the uterus in hopes of achieving a pregnancy — Erin and Jay finally welcomed their first child, a daughter born during the pandemic. Later, after more heartbreak, their second child arrived. They named them Charlotte and Thomas.

Charlotte, now four, embraces her new role as big sister with delight.
"She calls him her 'baby guy,'" Erin smiles. "She'll say to him, 'Hi, it's Big Sis!' and it's the most magical thing."
Thomas, just four months old, is beginning to smile, and hints of his personality are already starting to shine through. Erin is soaking in every moment.
"Having my children is the greatest blessing," she says. "In this phase of life, it's about sitting on the floor, doing puzzles and hearing my kids laugh. That's the best part. That's what we were waiting for."